Times have eased, thank God.
It is all a great opportunity to Not Take Things Personally. None of it is. Personal, that is.
Hard to grasp, and hard to let go of being an endless victim, but it is the truth behind all. If you can let things drop in front of you instead of putting up a wall of resistance and then pain, life is so much sweeter.
But how to climb over the insurmountable mountain of the ego? It is in a flash, so fast as to be almost invisible, that it rears up and blocks all sensible thought and response to each moment. Certainly this has been my recent reality. Taking that instant and pulling back is such a huge step. So hard to ground into, but it is vital if one is to survive in the continually swirling torture of every day in the 21st Century.
That sounds awful, I know, but life is huge and so, so fast now. All so disposable and pressured. I think and feel that it must be really hard for the youth emerging into it now. Where nothing really has value, especially not the individual. Perfection is man-made and you can never arrive, because the moment you touch the possibility it has moved gone Äúout of date/fashion/styleÄù. Hence my feelings about how hard this time has become.
Scotland, St Andrews, felt easier. Less advertising, less speed, but central London yesterday was hideous and lonely. There was a real feeling of desperation. Admittedly I was in Soho. Fashionistas, drug addicts, alcoholics, and bikers all over the place, rubbish gently swirling in the tailwinds of passers by. And most people were walking along talking and eating. No time, no grounding, no stillness.
I can watch and judge when the heat is off. When it is on, I am there with the rest of them. Where is the progress?